You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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