ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
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The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
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