Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
