He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
