I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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