I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
