I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
