I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
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