I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Randomize