Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I am full of burrito and curiosity
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
