I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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