i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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