bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize