Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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