i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
