history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Randomize