just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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