Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
