party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
