These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
