sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
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