Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Of course I have a pirate flag
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
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