Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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