halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
