My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
So much Jack, so little girl.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
