Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
