bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
