I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Randomize