It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
