Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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