don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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