I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.