I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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