dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I am one with the molecules
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
