I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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