he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
