how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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