Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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