its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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