Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
