Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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