This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
She's like a pop up book from hell.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize