Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
