doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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