ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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