She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
