Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
