Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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