I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize