like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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