Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
